Tuesday, May 20, 2003

I found the show "Coupling" on BBC America a few months ago, when it was announced that NBC would be remaking it as a US-based show. If you haven't heard of it, it's most often described as a cross between "Friends" and "Sex and the City".

In episode 1.4 ("Inferno"), Steve's girlfriend found a copy of a video he has called "Lesbian Spank Inferno" (and no, I'm not just writing that to make my hit count rise, I don't have a hit counter here yet). At a hilarious dinner party, the question was asked of Steve, "why do you like movies like 'Lesbian Spank Inferno'?"

His reply:

Because it's got naked women in it! Look, I like naked women! I'm a bloke, I'm supposed to like them, we're born like that! We like naked women as soon as we're pulled out of one! Halfway down the birth canal we're already enjoying the view! Look, it is the four pillars of the male heterosexual psyche. We like: naked women, stockings, lesbians, and Sean Connery best as James Bond. Because that is what being a boy is. And if you don't like it, darling, join the film collective. Look, I want to spend the rest of my life with the woman at the end of that table there, but that does not stop me wanting to see several thousand more naked bottoms before I die. Because that's what being a bloke is!

When man invented fire, he didn't say, "hey, let's cook!" He said "great, now we can see naked bottoms in the dark!" As soon as Caxton invented the printing press, we were using it to make pictures of - hey! - naked bottoms. We've turned the internet into an enormous international database of - naked bottoms!

So, you see, the story of man's achievement through the ages, feeble though it may have been, has been the story of our struggle to get a better look at your bottoms. Frankly, girls, I'm not sure how insulted you really ought to be.

I don't know how long the US version is going to last (though it's got the lovely and talented Rena Sofer in the role of Sally, played by the just as lovely and talented Sarah Alexander), but the BBC version of this show rocks.

PS.... Lesbian Spank Inferno. Heh.

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